Babies don't keep - Cleaning can wait

What is the state of your house at the moment? Pre-kids, having a clean house was important to us. Post kids, it's taken a while to let go of, but honestly, children grow up so quickly. You won't remember what your floors looked like, whether your windows were clean, or whether there were dishes in the sink. You'll remember the smell of your newborn baby. You'll remember the delightful peal of laughter as your toddler wipes their dirty hands on the window and makes pictures with yogurt while you're not looking. You'll remember the peaceful silence while your baby breastfeeds or sleeps.

There are several benefits to letting go of the 'Perfect Clean House' (or PCH for short). The first is you can relax, you can stop chasing after your kids and cleaning up after them. When you're aiming for a PCH you can get so caught up in trying to keep things clean that you end up spending more time chasing after you kids, either cleaning up after them, or nagging them to clean up that you can't relax and enjoy them. Or you stay up at night cleaning and doing laundry instead of chilling out or sleeping. 

The second benefit is that once you let go of the PCH, your friends can relax too. Have you noticed that when you visit someone with a PCH you feel under more pressure to have a PCH when they visit you too? And if you need a PCH before visiting friends or inviting friends over then you're less likely to invite someone over, which contributes to that feeling of isolation that so many new parents have. 

Another great benefit is that it is more efficient to clean all at once instead of on an ongoing basis (and so much more satisfying!). When you do a big load of washing instead of lots of little ones, for example, you save time (and water and detergent for the eco-minded!). When you wash up a big load of dishes at the end of the day instead of throughout the day, the same principle applies (or just doing one big load in the dishwasher!). Putting away a couple of huge loads of laundry is more efficient (especially when you recruit the whole household to help), then putting away bits all week long.

Finally, you can relax when you have other kids over to play - instead of stressing about how many toys are all over the house, you can chill out and enjoy a cuppa with friends, because you know that it can all be cleaned up at the same time at the end of the day (or the next day, or the day after). Or, even better, you can get everyone to help put the stuff away before they go home. 

There is a tiny disclaimer at the end here though. I totally get that letting go of the PCH can be really hard. We are so conditioned to being 'productive' and to projecting this image of being 'on top of things' to the world. Having a PCH is a huge part of this. On top of this, when you feel as though you're stuck in a groundhog day of dirty nappies, breastfeeding and sleep deprivation it can feel really great to get a room cleaned up, or to have an area that is clean and calm, just to feel productive and 'on top of it'. That is totally ok too!

The minimalism movement suggests that a clean and tidy house is the key to a calm mind, and to a certain extent this can be true as well. Personally, I do agree that less clutter means less stress, and for me, I tend to annually donate boxes of toys and clothes that we no longer use to help keep our clutter levels down, but the rest of the year it just isn't possible. I like to have just one area that I like to keep a certain way that is 'my' area for my own peace of mind. The rest of the house doesn't need to be a PCH. I like my kids to feel like they can play anywhere in the house with their toys, not just in a dedicated play room, and so the idea of a PCH just isn't possible!

So, gorgeous Mama, here's to letting go of those PCH's and enjoying ourselves more!

Leave a comment below and let me know how your perfect clean house is going :)

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Babies Don’t Keep

By Ruth Hulbert Hamilton

Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,

Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,

Hang out the washing, make up the bed,

Sew on a button and butter the bread.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?

She’s up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.

Oh, I’ve grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue,

Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.

Dishes are waiting and bills are past due,

Lullabye, rockaby, lullabye loo.

The shopping’s not done and there’s nothing for stew

And out in the yard there’s a hullabaloo,

But I’m playing Kanga and this is my Roo,

Lullabye, rockaby lullabye loo.

The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow

For children grow up as I’ve learned to my sorrow.

So quiet down cobwebs;

Dust go to sleep!

I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.

About the author

Corryn is Mum to 2 boys and owner of Milk and Love. She started Milk and Love because she couldn't find nursing tops or dresses made with natural fabrics that were easy to breastfeed in. These days, Corryn loves sending gorgeous nursing clothes out to mums all over Australia and supporting breastfeeding through the Milk and Love blog, Facebook page and Instagram.